Pulse - Part Two Page 5
"Never assume anything, Nathan." I turn to walk down the street. "A good attorney never does that."
Chapter 16
"I shouldn't have to beg you to read text messages I send you." I glance at the roses that are now sitting next to my bed, slowly wilting.
"I shouldn't have to wait almost a week after giving you flowers to hear from you." He sits on a chair next to the bed, his legs crossed, his suit jacket hanging open.
"I needed time to think and to deal with things."
"What things?" he pushes the question back at me so quickly. What happens if I open up to him and we end up back in the same spot we're always in? In bed with no connection to one another beyond that?
"I think we should cut out the exclusive part of our relationship." I don’t see any reason to beat around the bush. I don’t want to keep having false expectations when I know he can't possibly emotionally deliver on them.
"Why would we do that?" He moves to the edge of the bed. "There's someone you want to fuck?"
"How do you get through your workday when all you think about is fucking?" I ask half-teasingly. It's a question I've long wanted an answer to. I've never met anyone who talks about sex or thinks about sex as much as Nathan.
"You're diverting." He traces a finger over the pattern on the cotton blanket. "Who do you want to fuck? I need to know."
"Right now, absolutely no one, present company included." I don't show any emotion with the statement. I don't want to. I can't fall back into this knowing that he only sees me as someone who can get him off whenever he wants.
"You didn't call me over here to fuck you?"
I stop before I answer. I exhale sharply thinking carefully about how I should respond. "You like fucking me, don’t you?"
"I love fucking you." The smile that crashes over his lips makes him devastatingly handsome. Only he can say the word fuck so effortlessly and yet with so much raw desire.
"We need to get back to that." I slide the words over my lips, thinking about how amazing it would be right now to just let go and let him claim me again.
"I'm all for that." He eases his suit jacket from his shoulders, letting it fall to the bed behind him.
"Sit here." I pat the area where my pillows are. "Rest your back against the headboard."
He stands and quickly starts unbuttoning his shirt.
"Clothes on, Nathan." I command. He really only has a one track mind. It's becoming clearer to me each time we spend a moment together.
He kicks off his shoes before he sets himself at the head of the bed. I crawl into his lap, pulling the skirt of my sundress around my thighs.
"I really like you." I lightly graze my lips across his. "I've never met any man like you before."
His heavy lashes close slightly as he breathes in the scent of my skin. "I've never met anyone like you before, Jessica." He pulls me closer, the stubble on his skin, grazing my cheek.
"Sex with you is so good." I kiss him lightly. "I love it. I really love it."
"Me too." His hands inch up my thighs and I don’t stop him. I don't want to stop him.
I pull my panties across his pants, feeling his swollen cock straining against the fabric. "You and I just need to fuck and nothing else."
"I want to fuck you so much." His hands skirt the edges of my panties, playfully pulling at them.
"You think about fucking me all the time." I whisper into his cheek. "That's what you picture when you think about me."
"It's all I think about." He groans as his finger slides over my cleft. "You're just so ripe and ready for me. You always are."
"If I let you fuck me now, you'd like that," I tease.
"I'd love that." He pushes a finger across my moist folds and I have to bite back a moan.
"Don't you wonder..." I let the words trail as he circles my clit with his finger.
"Wonder how good you're going to taste when I eat you?" He deftly pushes a finger inside of me.
"Wonder what happened to me in Connecticut." I pull back and stare at his face.
His eyelids close briefly before he pulls his gaze to mine. "You would tell me if you wanted me to know."
I shift my body to try and move from his grasp, put he slides another finger into me.
"You don't want to know." I bite back all the emotions that are racing through me. I want to hate him for not caring. I want him to push me back and lick my wetness until I'm screaming his name. I want him to react. I want him to feel something besides unadulterated lust for me.
"Don't play games with me, Jessica." He pushes his fingers farther into me until I can't help but release a small moan.
"I'm not." I push back on his legs, trying to disengage myself from his body but he's unrelenting. "Don't act like you don’t want me as much as I want you." He twists his fingers within me as his thumb settles on my clit.
"I don't want you," I lie through clenched teeth. I don’t want him just like this. I want to mean more to him than a fuck. I have to mean more than that.
"Stop lying." He leans back and pulls on my thigh with his free hand. "I'm going to make you come with my fingers, just like that first night. You're going to scream my name by the end of tonight because your body craves mine."
"No," I push back against him. "I won't scream your name."
"When you're in this bed at night, you touch this," he nods to his fingers. "You pull your fingers over your clit while you think about my tongue."
"Don't say that." I feel so shameless. I wanted to seduce him into admitting he only wanted me for sex. I wanted to make him see that there was more to me.
"You're getting close. You're so swollen and ready." He pushes another finger into me, stretching my pleasure. "I should fuck you right now."
"I'm..." my voice trails as I feel an orgasm wash through me. I pant, biting my lip to hold back the quiver that is rushing over me. "Nathan," I say his name in a breathless whisper. "Nathan."
He pulls me into his chest, resting my head against his cheek. "I wanted..." I don't know what I wanted but he knew what I needed.
"Jessica." He cradles the side of my head as he whispers softly in my ear. "You grew up in Bloomfield, Connecticut. You're a registered EMT. You were living with a jackass named Josh Redmond who fucked you over so badly because he made you believe you were responsible for his grandfather's death. You ran away from all of that and you fell into me. I've got you. I'm not letting you go."
I pull my head up and stare at his face. I can't form one word in response. I can't process everything that just came out of his mouth.
"You didn't really think I just spent the last week of my life jerking off to memories of you, did you? I had to fill in my time somehow."
"I don't know what to say." I feel my lips tremble.
"Don't say anything." He pulls my head back into his chest. "This isn't romantic. Don’t take it that way. You can't tell a lawyer you killed a man and expect him not to want to know more. "
I smile softly as I pull my arms around him.
Chapter 17
"Are you going to tell me about Boston?" I offer him a bite of my baked pretzel and he pulls off a large piece.
"What about Boston?" He chews on it before reaching to take the plastic cup filled with lemonade from my grasp.
My eyes follow a nanny with her two young charges as they race towards the entrance of the Central Park Zoo. "You said you'd explain why you don't look at your messages when you're in Boston."
He pulls the remaining pretzel from my grasp. "I'm starving. We should have gone for a sandwich."
"Don't divert." I push at him. "Meeting in the park at noon was your idea, not mine."
"I wanted to see your face." He taps me on the nose. "Work is a bitch right now."
I nod. "Boston." I push again.
"Boston." A slight grin pulls at the corner of his mouth. "This is why I ignore everything when I'm in Boston."
I watch in silence as he pulls his wallet from the inner pocket of his suit jacket.
He carefully opens one of the flaps to reveal two small pictures. He holds them up for me to gaze at. "This is Madison and this is Mackenzie."
I smile at the glowing faces of two children. "Your niece and nephew." I recognize their images from the picture that was in his apartment when Cassandra took me there. "I saw a picture of them on your mantel."
"The day Cassie took you in?" He drops his gaze to his pants, pulling softly on a loose thread.
"Yes." I wish I hadn't brought it up. I don't want to talk about her anymore. I don't want to talk about anything but the two of us.
"I don't miss her at all." His voice is quiet and raspy. "If you left me, I'd miss you so much."
I turn sharply to look at his face but he's staring into the distance. "I'm not going anywhere."
"I'm serious, Jessica." He pulls his eyes shut for a brief moment before he turns to look at me. "I'd miss you too much. You get that, don't you?"
"I get that," I reply quickly. "I do."
"Come over tonight." He pulls his lips across the bare skin of my shoulder. "I need you."
He's never said that. He needs me? "What's wrong?" I need to ask. I have to know. He doesn't open up like this. There aren't any small cracks in Nathan Moore's demeanor.
"Be there at eight. I'll be waiting for you." He reaches to pull my palm across his lips.
***
"Nathan," I gasp as he plunges his tongue inside of me. "Please. It's too much."
"Never." He cradles my ass off the bed, his mouth deftly close to coaxing yet another orgasm from deep within me.
My body is trembling, I'm covered in sweat, my hands gripping his bed sheets. "You have to stop."
"I can't stop." He angles my body higher so his tongue can probe me deeper. "I love the taste of you."
"I can't breathe." My hands dart to his hair, pulling on the soft strands. "Let me suck you off. Please."
"You're going to suck my cock." His breath tickles across my overly sensitive folds. "You're going to suck me until I come all over your body."
The raspy sound of his voice pushes me closer to the edge. I almost whimper from the sensation. I can't keep up. I can't do this. It's so much.
"You’re the sweetest little thing." He laps lazily at my clit, pulling it softly between his teeth. "I can't wait until my cock is buried inside you and you're clawing at my back."
I race over the edge at the thought of him inside of me. He hasn't fucked me in so long. It feels like so long.
I feel the bed heave beneath me as he moves his body from it. I close my eyes knowing he's getting a condom. He's going to fuck me when I've already come so many times.
"Nathan," I whisper his name through heavy lips. I feel so spent. I feel as though his mouth pulled every ounce of strength from within me. How can he make me feel so much?
"Jessica." He breathes into me as his lips skirt softly over mine. "Spread your legs. I have to fuck you now."
"I can't." I lift my hand and rest it against his chest. I feel the fine mist of sweat that is glistening over his skin. He worked so hard to make me come so many times.
"Feel it." He pulls the heavy weight of his cock over my cleft and I moan loudly at the sensation. My hips buck in reflex. My body wants him even if I can't handle the idea of any more pleasure.
"Oh god, "I whimper. "It's so much."
"Today, in the park." He eases himself slowly between my folds. "The sun caught your hair. So pretty, so beautiful."
I moan loudly as my hips shift to take in the full length of his cock.
"You'll never get enough of my cock." He glides his lips across my cheekbone as the words skirt across my skin. "You looked so perfect today. Not just like a woman I couldn't wait to fuck. It was more."
I clench my hands around his back as he pounds into me. "Nathan, it's so good."
"So good, Jessica." He strokes into me, his cock pushing deeper with each thrust. "I love how you feel. You're always so ready for me. Your body. My body."
I feel my pulse race at the words. I want to belong to him. I want him to want me that way.
"Fuck." The word escapes my lips from the deepest part of me. The part that is inextricably linked to his pleasure.
He ups the tempo, his cock vibrating within me. He's close to pulling another orgasm from my body and I can't wait to rush over the edge.
He lets out an animalistic growl when I clench my sex around him as I near my release. My fingernails dig into his ass, pushing him to his limit, pulling him into me.
"Jessica," he cries out as a vein is his neck pulses. I feel his body contract with desire just as my own orgasm crashes through me.
Chapter 18
"Stay."
It's a single word. One small word isn't supposed to hold so much emotion. He doesn't understand that. He can't understand what he's asking of me.
"You want me to stay?" I pull the dress I was wearing when I got to his apartment back over my head.
"Yes." Another simple word. There's no inflection is his tone. I can't tell if he's being serious.
"Nathan." I reach down to pick up my panties and toss them aside once I realize he ripped them in his haste to get me naked beneath him.
"I can't let you go tonight." There's no mistaking the ripe emotion rippling through the words. "Get back into bed. I need you here."
I yank the dress back over my head and ease back beside him. He pulls me close, his arm circling my waist.
"Jessica." His breath runs hot against my back. "Listen to me."
I try to turn so I'm facing him but he holds steady to my body. I feel his breath catch when I reach back to run my finger along his thigh.
"Listen," he repeats the word. "I can't handle you with anyone else."
"I know." I breathe in a heavy sigh. We're going to circle the subject of my not having sex with anyone else again even though I haven't contemplated the thought in weeks. I even turned Drew down when he asked me out to a movie with him and some friends of his.
"No." His body is trembling. I can feel it reverberate through me. "You don’t understand."
"I do." I try to reassure him. He's probably freaking out over the fact that the man I bought the pretzel from at lunch winked at me. I should confess that he winks at every woman who gives him a dollar tip.
"I feel things." His voice cracks and my breathing stalls. "Things I don't know how to feel."
I can't move. I can only listen and feel his emotions race through me.
"I fuck women." I sense the stubble of his chin on my cheek as he shakes his head slightly. "I used to fuck women and I didn't think twice about them. I couldn't tell you their names or what they looked like anymore."
I don’t respond. I can't say a word. He's being more open right now than he's ever been. I can't derail this.
"I can tell you that the second tooth on the upper left side of your mouth is slightly crooked. Not enough that anyone would notice but it makes your smile more beautiful."
I feel my eyes swell with tears as I listen intently to his words.
"I can tell you that when you laugh you pull your hand to your face to cover your perfect mouth. Every time you laugh. I first noticed it when you were at the restaurant with your roommates. It's adorable."
I nod. I do that. I know I do that. I've always done that.
"I can tell you that you say my name unlike anyone else on the planet and I live for the sound of it. Sometimes I just close my eyes and imagine the word rolling from your lips. I could listen to it forever."
"I don't say it differently."
"Say it now."
"Nathan."
"Like that." He pulls my body into his. "Just like that."
I smile at his reaction.
"I can't stand the thought of another man knowing any of this." His lips push into my shoulder. "Promise me you won't let anyone else see this part of you. Promise me."
I nod my head in silence. I don't know what to say. Something has shifted between us. That small crack that I saw with
in him has split wide open.
Chapter 19
"I'm going to Boston next weekend. Are you working?" I love how casually he shares information about his life. It's been a week since his tender confession in the bedroom and I've spent every night tucked into his bed and his life.
"Just on Sunday." I sigh. "I have Saturday off. Bryce's girlfriend is coming to town so we're going to hang out."
"That'll be fun?" It's more of a question than a statement and I can't help but laugh.
"It will be." I push back against his chest. "I haven't met her yet, but I hear great things about her whenever I catch Bryce long enough to talk to him."
"You'll have a good time." His hand drops to stroke my thigh. "Are you taking her to your restaurant?"
"No." I shake my head slightly. "Somewhere simple and then to a movie."
"What about Rebecca?"
"Hot date or something." I shrug as I run my hand down his chest. "Or maybe it's just an excuse because she doesn't want to hang out with me."
"How could anyone not want to hang out with this?" He pulls the blanket off of both of us with one swift flick of his wrist.
"You're such a charmer." I push my back into the sheets, pulling my hand over my breasts. "You know just what to say to a girl to make her wet."
"Make her wet." His full lips graze over mine with a heated touch. "You're always wet for me, Jessica."
"Always," I let the word flow between my lips slowly as my fingers part my folds. He's right. I'm always wet for him.
"That very first moment when you walked into the club, I knew you were made just for me." He eases his body slowly on top of mine. I hear the sound of the condom package in his hands. His eyes never break my gaze as he pulls it over his cock.
"I was made for you." I circle my hips on the bed when I feel his cock skirt across my clit.
"I chased after you the next night because you slipped away when I fell asleep." My full lips part slightly as he pushes just the head between my folds.
"You were so sleepy." I kiss the side of his cheek before my breath rushes at the feeling of his full length pushing into me.